BEST SHOT

by ene ijato - July 20, 2017

This wasn’t an intended pun, but I’d rather you believe it was and hail the prowess of my verbosity. But seriously, this post is just about bloody life. (well I did it again, I’m on fire!)

Couldn’t I be more specific and tell you that I’ve had one of the worst few days in a while? Yes, I could; I’ve had one of the worst few days in a while. The pressures of Nigerian Uni has shocked me to my very core and I have undoubtedly touched failure with my tongue. Tasted the bitterness of its sting and I can still feel the residual taste at the back of my throat.

Failure perhaps in many ways is a relative thing. The kind of failure I talk about is the kind that sucks at your insides and breaks you. Tempts you to dwell in self-pity and resentment, in had-I-knowns and anger. But anger is good sometimes, anger at the right things, at how careless you could have been, how oblivious. Anger has a good history of fuelling change so I do not resent my anger instead I embrace it and use it to propel myself.

Staying on top of every hour has for me become a priority, my phone’s to-do list/alarm has been my friendly ear buzz recently and perhaps I really do need some incessant noise to distract me from life’s nagging pessimism.

I find solitude to be healing, pure solitude for the very few moments in a day I can afford it.

The notion of being unseen high above the motions of life’s stringent hustle where reality impinges, almost as though I had stepped into another time and space completely mine.

So here I was on the Penthouse rooftop of my faculty building dwelling for a few minutes in my presence and people-watching. The scurrying lives of so many young people, searching for knowledge, near-perfect grades or even something to just look good on a future job resume. I asked myself what I scurry for? And the answer settled in my chest like a brushstroke of blue on a gloomy pre-rain sky.

For whatever I have chosen, whatever has been bestowed upon me by chance, there is no better play than to give it my best shot. No better answer than to give it all I have, because the world moves at such a fast pace and securing a career of choice or sustenance for sustenance is perhaps the goal of every young adult.

As my alarm buzzed for my next rendezvous, I walked down the staircases (the descent is way less knee numbing, l tell you) and joined a community of scurrying minds hoping to change the world one oversized boyfriend jean at a time.

To all Linkin Park lovers, pseudo, full blooded or not at all, Chester Bennington’s dive would perhaps be a clear-cut example of how success or happiness isn’t always what we see. Slow down and enjoy life I tell myself, my happiness cannot be judged by what others think it should be…It shouldn’t. I shall very well still be jamming to Hybrid Theory until Sunrise.

Wham Bam! With love, x EJ

Photography & Editing // Mustapha Bello & Ene Ijato

Tags :

8 comments

Anonymous21 July 2017 at 07:38
Your thoughts are very intriguing and concise. Each time I went through it I get new ideas,ideas could wallow in with my thoughts...B*
ReplyDelete
Replies
Unknown21 July 2017 at 07:58
Excellent piece. 🙂
Sometimes I wonder, could there be anything more difficult than schooling? It's like a 24hour job without anything substantial to comfort yourself for the so much effort that goes into it.
ReplyDelete
Replies
Unknown21 July 2017 at 12:21
I absolutely loved reading this, it's so true and raw, I love it. Nigerian universities have a way of making school feel like hell but something I've come to learn is after that experience, life will definitely be out of cards to throw you that you can't catch. You're so beautiful and your writing... (speechless) well done 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
ReplyDelete
Replies
Olamide23 July 2017 at 05:51
Nice piece.
ReplyDelete
Replies
Unknown24 July 2017 at 00:37
Ooo... Relatable asf
In the end I just have to give school my best, it can't take the greatest part of These valuable years and have nothing to show for it
ReplyDelete
Replies